▶ Alien Encounter A UFO lands on the lawn. The board member on night patrol does not look up in wonder — he looks up the covenant.
▶ Name, Image, Likeness The board has just learned what NIL means and has questions about the teenager.
▶ The ARC Time Machine Seasons pass. The kids move out. The beard goes white. Then, at long last: APPROVED.
▶ The Devil Came Down to the HOA He was lookin’ for a soul to steal. He found a covenant violation instead.
▶ Neighborhood Watch Happy Hour When the neighborhood watch has a happy hour, the cameras start multiplying.
▶ HOA Inspectors: Roll Out The squad arrives by van, measures the grass to the quarter inch, and cheers while the citation is written. Protecting property values, one cheer at a time.
▶ Gary’s Comeback Season Gary got approved to play middle school football. Nobody asked who approved it.
▶ Anonymous Trash Can Complaint An anonymous tip. A suspicious reflection. Anonymous to everyone except the trash can.
▶ Dr. Feel Good He’s the one they call Dr. Feel Good — he comes by wagon, and the co-pay is one lawn chair.
▶ Drinking and HOAing The one that started it all. Protecting property values, one bourbon at a time.
