Now Holding Tryouts

The HOA Inspectors

A high-energy cheer and dance squad, in the tradition of professional sports entertainment teams. Instead of an intimidating inspector with a clipboard, the inspection arrives as a full production.

The routine

“TRASH CAN OUT!”

“GRASS TOO HIGH!”

“PAINT COLOR DENIED!”

“GOOOOO HOA!”

What the squad does

  • Appears in videos whenever an inspection is happening
  • Live appearances at community events, block parties and sponsor activations
  • Social content in squad uniform
  • Halftime-style routines at HOA meetings that have run past ninety minutes
  • Their own merchandise line in the store

Tryouts

We are building the first squad now. If you cheer, dance, tumble, coach, choreograph, or simply have the lung capacity to yell “TRASH CAN OUT” convincingly, we want to hear from you.

No experience required for the shouting division.

Prefer email? Write to impaired@drinkingandhoaing.com with the subject line “HOA Inspectors Tryout.”

For sponsors

The squad is a sponsorship asset in its own right: branded uniforms, named appearances, social content and live activations. Talk to us about sponsoring the squad →